The Girl

My daughter (The Girl) is growing up to be too much like me.  I am both proud and scared.  Proud because she has an awesome sense of humor.  Scared because it looks like some day she’ll be more sarcastic and daring than I am!!

The other day while we were out shopping and spotted this shirt and INSISTED on buying it.

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I love it and would have bought it for myself if I had seen it first!!

 

Then she begged me to buy her this kitten shirt.  So not me.  Way better!!

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So much awesome in such a little package.  I’m glad she picked me out of all of the possible parents in the world!!

~Jennifer

One Day …

One day my children will be able to pee without soaking the toilet seat.

One day my children will be able to wash their hands without drowning the counter top.

One day my children will be able to hold a conversation without belching or farting.

One day my children will be able to pick up their dirty clothes without being asked.

One day my children will be able to get in the car without making 473,829 trips back into the house for something they forgot.

One day my children will be able to complete a trip to the supermarket without having to pee three times (and then whine the entire trip home that they have to pee again).

One day my children will be able to remember to say please and thank you without being prompted.

One day my children will be able to make a decision in less than sixty minutes.  It’s not that hard to choose between strawberry or grape jelly.

One day my children will be able to keep track of their shoes, and coats, and books, and toothbrushes.

One day my children will be able to hang up their wet towels after showering.

One day my children will be able to remove the empty toilet paper roll and replace it with a new one.

One day my children will be able to throw their trash into the trash can … not next to it.

One day my children will be able to go to sleep without all of the lights in the house on.

One day my children will be all grown up and not need me anymore.  But today is not that day.  Today they still need me.

~Jennifer

Mother’s Day Poem

Before I was a Mom, I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby. I didn’t worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never thought about immunizations. Before I was a Mom, I had never been puked on. Pooped on. Chewed on. Peed on. I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts. I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom, I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests. Or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom, I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn’t want to put her down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn’t stop the hurt. I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much. I never knew that I could love someone so much. I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom, I didn’t know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.. I didn’t know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby. I didn’t know that bond between a mother and her child. I didn’t know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom, I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay. I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn’t know I was capable of feeling so much, before I was a Mom.

Happy Mother’s Day

~Jennifer

(I do not know where this poem came from, but I had to share it with all of you.  It was too good not to.)

Eight Reasons

Eight Reasons Why I Hate My Kids

1. They’re smelly.
-I mean, come on. You’ve smelled them. They usually smell like dirt and sweat. In no way is that cute and cuddly. All it makes me want to do is take them outside and hose them down.

2. They’re loud.
-Really loud. Especially when you’re tired or sick. They run. They yell. They bounce. Sometimes I wonder if they’re doing construction down at the end of the hallway. All of the banging and window rattling. They better have some new shelves or an extra bathroom down there when they’re finished.

3. They’re clingy.
-They love to climb on you, hang on you, and drag behind you when they grab your leg while you’re walking through the grocery store. They are most clingy when they are denied something that they ABSOLUTELY MUST HAVE!!! Like those Hot Wheels cars or that shiny Hello Kitty plastered laptop.

4. They don’t listen.
-You can talk until you’re blue in the face. They never hear a word of what you say. Don’t take food out of the kitchen? No, didn’t hear that. Clean up your room? Nope, didn’t hear that either. Don’t jump on the bed? What did you say, Mom? Go ahead and jump on the bed?!?! AWESOME!!! They do not hear a syllable that comes out of your mouth……unless you say something about your mother-in-law. Then they hear (and remember) EVERY word!!

5. They’re clumsy.
-They’re always running into something or falling down. They’re always covered in bumps, bruises and Dora the Explorer Band-Aids. And it never fails, the day before school pictures they will get a black eye.

6. They’re needy.
-They need that toy they saw on TV. If they don’t get it, they won’t be able to survive. They need that lovey they left at daycare. You know, the one they’ve slept with every night since the day they were born. They need money for that fundraiser at school. They need money for that hot date they have on Friday. They always need something, but don’t expect to get anything in return…except maybe attitude.

7. They’re giving.
-They really are. They’ll give you that runny nose, that raging fever, and that pukey stomach. They give you their empty candy wrappers and that handful of dog poop that they picked up out of the grass. And you must accept all of these with a smile or they will become loud and clingy.

8. They smile.
-But it will be that devious little smile that they use when they know they’ve done something that they shouldn’t have.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Eight Reasons Why I Love My Kids

1. They’re smelly.
-That new baby smell, whatever it is, always gets me. I don’t know what makes it so intoxicating, but I just can’t help holding a new baby close and inhaling all of the wonderfulness of a new life.

2. They’re loud.
-Especially when they know they’re right or when they know somebody is being wronged. They stand up for what they feel is right and they will defend their ideas to the ends of the earth. They will stand up for that man, woman, or child who is not able to defend themselves.

3. They’re clingy.
-When their best friend finds someone better. When their first love finds someone else. They know they can come home for a hug and a sympathetic ear, knowing that you’ve probably been in their shoes at one time or another.

4. They don’t listen.
-At least, not always. Why? Because they’ve been raised to be independent individuals. To make their own decisions. To follow their heart. To do what’s best for themselves and their family. They don’t listen to those who say they cannot because if it’s important or right, they will find a way.

5. They’re clumsy.
-They live life, but sometimes they fail. Sometimes things go wrong. But this is okay because they know that if they ever need to they can come home. Even if it’s only to dry their tears.

6. They’re needy.
-They need you. They really do. Especially after a nightmare or the first time they’re turned down for that dream job. They need someone who understands what they’re going through. Most likely since you’ve been there, too. They need you to pick them up, dust them off, and send them back out there to try again.

7. They’re giving.
-They give you unlimited hugs and kisses. They give you their hopes and dreams. They give you their very lives with the hope that you’ll teach them everything that they need to know to succeed in life. And they give you all of their love in return.

8. They smile.
-And when they do, your heart just melts.

~Jennifer