Did you hear that?
That noise from the other room. It sounded like a sniffle or maybe a little sneeze. Who’s in there? Oh, God please let it be one of the kids!!
I do a quick inventory. The oldest is at work and therefore, out of earshot. The Girl is sitting across the room, head bopping to whatever it is she’s listening to on her headphones. The Boy? Where is he? Could that sickly noise have been his? Oh, please, oh, please let it be him!! Nope. He’s in his room, simulating a demolition derby with every single car he owns.
That only leaves one person. Not the sweet little babies that you want to cuddle and comfort. Not the adolescents that you tuck into warm beds with their favorite (and usually abandoned) stuffed bear.
No. It’s the one person that you NEVER want to be sick.
It’s the husband.
And he has “The Man Flu”.
Days upon days of moaning and whining. Requests for water, snacks, and drugs of various kinds. Tylenol, cough drops, and nasal spray. Crackers and Sprite. Tissues, hot pads and ice packs. Sometimes random requests that have no bearing on any illness known to mankind.
All of this for a simple, drippy nose kind of cold. Not pneumonia. Not diphtheria or malaria. Just a runny nose. When this happens, I’m lucky if he showers, let alone helps around the house.
After a couple of days of “doctoring”, he drags himself to the dinner table, so weak and malnourished (the food he’s eaten while “sick” doesn’t count) that he devours everything in sight. He then announces that he’ll help clear the table and take care of the dishes. (*gasp*) Before I have a chance to be thankful, he tells the kids, “clean up the kitchen for your mother!” and then he strolls back into the living room, plops down in the recliner and starts channel surfing.
Oh well. A least he’s back to normal and the house can now resume its regular rhythm.
Did you hear that? That little noise, like a cough or a sneeze.
Oh wait. It’s just Mom.
Carry on, family.
~Jennifer – who is sickly but carrying on.