I FIXED THE INTERNET

Backwards, hillbilly, middle of nowhere internet not working? Here are some simple steps to fix it!

 

  1. Dial number of your local internet company.
  2. Wait through 43,674 options until you hear the one for reporting an outage.
  3. Enter you account number.
  4. Enter account number again, forcefully jabbing smartphone for every number because the backwards, hillbilly, middle of nowhere internet company didn’t understand your number.
  5. Wait through 8,231 more options until you realize there is no option for what you need.
  6. Stay on the line, as instructed, for the next available operator.
  7. Hear that your wait time is “more than 10 minutes”.
  8. Swear into your phone at the backwards, hillbilly, middle of nowhere internet company for being complete and total fucking morons for not being able to run an internet company that actually provides internet on a regular basis to their customers.
  9. Be pissed off because your spectacular mini meltdown was heard by no one but your cat.
  10. Fiddle with buttons and cord while waiting an eternity for SOMEONE to answer your call.
  11. After approximately 14 minutes on hold, hit that Facebook button ONE MORE TIME, because the previous 839 clicks produced nothing.
  12. Sit staring at your computer, mesmerized, watching Facebook load on your browser.
  13. Slowly reach over and click the off button on your phone.
  14. Be AMAZED that you, a regular person, FIXED THE INTERNET!!!!!!
  15. Celebrate by updating your Facebook status telling everyone how truly amazing you are!

~Jennifer

Seventy Days

 

That’s how long I’ve been on my weight loss journey.

 

Seventy days.

 

That’s how long it took before I realized how much my thoughts and actions have changed.  Thoughts and actions that I have been accustomed to for over forty years.

 

We have recently become a “camping family”.  Almost two years ago we purchased a camper.  I have always hated sleeping in a tent on the ground, so my husband thought that a camper might help change my mind about camping.  Funny thing is, it did!  Last summer I was looking for campgrounds and campsites where I could sit in the shade and relax for the weekend.  I became part of the camping elite.  And I enjoyed it!!

 

This year has started out very differently.  I realized not only was I looking for great places to relax, I was looking for places with awesome hiking trails!!  I’m not talking about strolling alone the lake or the river.  I’m talking about trails.  Long trails.  Yesterday I found a great trail nearby and was disappointed that it was only 1.5 miles long!  Crazy!! I know!!!  But it feels so good to be crazy like this and I don’t plan on changing this crazy any time soon!!
I was determined to change and found a weight loss plan that made all the difference.  I’m so happy that this lifestyle change has been so easy for me and I’m excited for what the future holds.

 

If you are interested in losing weight take a look at Nutrisystem.  It has done amazing things for me and it may do that for you.  I’ve lost 32 pounds in 10 weeks.  If you use my referral code, you can get $30 off your first order.    http://my.nutrisystem.com/x/4JQpP9

 

~Jennifer

{I do not work for Nutrisystem and I am not being paid to promote their products}

Have Kids They Said….

It’ll be fun they said.

Children are wonderful.  They share everything.  Even germs.

It seems like every single little bug they bring home finds its way to me.

I must be special! Germ

I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I think I may need to trade in the kids for a Mustang or something.

~Jennifer

P.S. I love those little monsters anyway!!

Holy Cow!!

I’ve been on my weight loss journey for four weeks now and I cannot express how happy I am that I finally decided to do this.  Twenty-eight days into the program and I am down 20 pounds.  TWENTY POUNDS!!!  I cannot believe how easy it has been.  I’m not hungry.  I’m not miserable.  I’m not even craving the “bad” foods I had been living on the past few decades (no Dr Pepper?!?!).  I am so surprised how well this is working for me.

I haven’t shared exactly what I am using yet because I wasn’t sure how well (or badly) this would turn out.  Now I want to share with everyone!!

Nutrisystem is what I have been eating.  Prepackaged, proportioned food that is ready to heat and eat.  All I add is vegetables!  It’s almost too easy.  It is also teaching me what is good to eat and how much of it I should be eating.

I don’t want to sound like a commercial for Nutrisystem and I am not receiving any compensation for my experience or opinion (although I am open to an offer! *wink wink*) but if something is working for me, I don’t mind telling everyone!   Yes, it can be expensive but with a discount through my health insurance it is a more manageable price.  And considering I’m not buying fast food lunches and processed dinners I may actually be saving a little money!

If you are wanting to lose weight and become a healthier you, check out Nutrisystem.  Be sure to check with your health insurance provider for any discount offers they may have (BCBS does!) and check other companies for discounts (ebates, groupon, costco, QVC, etc).  You can also use my referral code (http://my.nutrisystem.com/x/vmQhGb) to save an extra $30 off your first order.

This will be a long journey (I have 110 pounds to lose), but with a start this successful, I am confident that I can achieve my goal.

Cheers to a great first month and hope for a wonderful second month!!

~Jennifer

Update…

After two weeks of planned food and actual exercise I am down a total of 11 pounds.  An awesome start and a massive motivator!

Right now my biggest obstacle is exercise.  I live in the middle of nowhere so I don’t have the option of walking around the neighborhood in the evening.  My only option is to walk around my property.  I used my Fitbit to measure that distance and discovered that each trip was almost a quarter of a mile.  Just like walking a track!  The biggest difference is that I live on a “mountain” so there is quite a bit of up and down in that little circle so it will actually be better for me.  When the weather is bad I can still use my treadmill but it won’t be as pretty.

Now all I need is to figure out what else I can do at home.  I live too far from town to pop into a gym.  I know that sounds like an excuse but with young kids and the distance, I need to do as much at I can at home.

I will figure out a solution.

I am determined.

I will prove I can do it.

I will be successful.

~Jennifer

The Girl

My daughter (The Girl) is growing up to be too much like me.  I am both proud and scared.  Proud because she has an awesome sense of humor.  Scared because it looks like some day she’ll be more sarcastic and daring than I am!!

The other day while we were out shopping and spotted this shirt and INSISTED on buying it.

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I love it and would have bought it for myself if I had seen it first!!

 

Then she begged me to buy her this kitten shirt.  So not me.  Way better!!

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So much awesome in such a little package.  I’m glad she picked me out of all of the possible parents in the world!!

~Jennifer